For those of you who like a little teeth

Is this taking the recent vampire revival to a whole new level, or what? Ever thirsting (sorry) to exploit the latest craze, this fleshlight in a soda can (wtf) is purported to really get your blood pumpin'. Just whip it out and soon your Eric Northman fantasies will be that much more vivid-or so they promise:

Polish up your stake and drive it into this soft, vampire mouth for an orgasm that will wake the living dead. Packing the same punch as the original Fleshjacks but housed in a compact soda can and featuring the exclusive Vampire Fang inner canal texture not found on any other Fleshjack product.

"An orgasm that could wake the living dead" - Sounds like the Dead Dolls will be getting a lot more bookings in the months to come.

Complete with a smutty photo gallery of some lucky dude getting his ahem, "stake polished," as well as a sexy video (which, sadly, I could not embed), the Count Cockula website is a must see.


Promise me you'll check it out, if only so you can come back and explain to me the connection between "a cum shooting experience so terrifying" and a soda can. Again, wtf.

Smut on the Dance Floor Pics!!

Mitra lookin' sleek 'n saucy

The first edition of Smut on the Dance Floor was a smashing success! Thanks so much to everyone who came out, volunteered and contributed their time. We couldn't have done it without you!! Stay tuned for news about our next event, which is sure to be even hotter and smuttier. What an effing good time. Srsly.

XXX
Lickety Split

DJ Mitz and Lickety founder & wonder woman, Amber

Everyone gettin' down on the sweaty dance floor

Lickety's fundraiser, Julie, doing double duty as DJ Muscleman

Me and art director, Lara, vamping it up!

Supr Fossl Powr killed the dance floor

So many smiles

An amazingly fun night!

Three cheers for DIY publishing, sex positive expression and all our wicked smutsters! Whoo hoo!

Cock Block Rock

"Abstinence rules! Playing is for fools!" from Michael Sweets 1994 self titled debut album.

A bit of news and a gros merci!

Photos of Amber and Kathleen at Lickety Split #7 launch party...in costume, of course! Kathleen is the teletubby and Amber is the shooting star!

Hey lovelies,

It's been a long time since we rock n' rolled, hasn't it? Well, it's time again for bulging pants and sticky panties! As you must have heard, Lickety Split smut zine is launching a new monthly dance party to offset printing costs for the next issue. Cum on out and party in support of the magazine you lust after! Check out the party details right here: http://licketysplitzine.blogspot.com/2009/10/lickety-split-presents-smut-on-dance.html

Also, just so's you know: Lickety Split smut zine has been taking time this year to freshen up and make some much-needed changes. Along with firming up our fundraising strategies, the Lickety team is transitioning by incorporating new collaborators (Sarah, Lara, Mitra and more!). You can contact Sarah directly at sarah@licketysplitzine.com. A couple of names you might recognize and some you will get to know better in the coming months! Some of us other Licketys (Amber and Kathleen) are moving on to heavy pet with some new projects, but we will still be out and about working in smaller ways to make Lickety Split the best indie porn mag it can be! We thought it would be nice to let you know that we've appreciated all the sweaty, turned pages over the years and that the new team is hotly pursuing the next issue of "guilt free and fun smut for everyone!" (2008 Expozine awards). Thanks for all the incredible support over the years, from the bottoms of our apple bottoms.

Stick around for more filthy fun and support Lickety Split!

Love,

Amber & Kathleen

Bash this, bozo!

Awesome. Effing. Website.

• Bash this, bozo! website
  
• More here on xtra.ca

Photo by Anita Schoepp

Smutty Pride

Check out this rad poster for Smut on the Dance Floor, created by one amazing Katie Shamash!

Amazing.

I am so pumped!!

UP YOURS!

UP YOURS! the monthly queer dance party is tomorrow night y'all!

This time around there will be three burlesque acts starting promptly at 11pm, so don't miss it.

It is also the first release party of the The Rimjobs, yeah that's right they are called The Rimjobs and they are going to adequately lube you up for the dance party after the performances.

DJs include:

Cat-o-Strofik

Muscleman

The Salvation Army

Disco Geek

Also special appearance by RPM (Roving Party Machine)

Be there, it's going to be awesome!!!

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=155431891312

Lickety Split Presents: Smut on the dance floor!!!

This is our first monthly dance party fundraiser. Excited? Because we are!

Come out to WOOF bar to support DIY publishing, and our sex positive community of writers, artists and performers.
Indulge your inner/outer exhibitionist/voyeur/dancer with the sexiest peeps to walk the block.

It will be a booty shaking, pelvic grinding, sweaty body touching, luscious lip kissing, naughty nipple showing good time.

The marvelous musical stylings of:
DJ Noisy Nora
DJ Muscle Man
DJ Mitz
DJ Horsecock
Supr Fossl Powr
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just wait, there's more!
Dirty Photo Booth
Peep Show
Kissing Booth
AND...
CHEAP BOOZE!!!!!!

$5 Dollars at the door and all proceeds go to fund our next launch!

PS. If anyone is interested in volunteering let us know!
PSS. Tell all your friends too!

Specifics:

Friday, October 23
10 pm-3 am
WOOF Bar, 1661 Ste-Catherine, E.
Metro Papineau

Contact: sarah@licketysplitzine.com

A Very Seductive Scent

Yum! Sexy car-gasms in Paris. If YSL can promise me this, all the time, I may just buy myself a bottle.

Hardcore Pussy

Everyone needs a little love on a rainy Friday night.

Iran in My Heart

Have you checked out Marjane Satrapi's graphic novel Embroideries, yet? It's been out for a little while now and I finally devoured it in one sitting this past weekend. An intimate, humourous and intelligent portrait of a few Iranian women's views on sex, love and marriage, it is a must read.

Alcohol: Women's Favourite Aphrodisiac?

An article in this week's BUST Newsletter, mulls over the "facts."

'Cause "women" is clearly a homogenous category and no one's ever seen Don Draper throw back a few before engaging in some car crashing infidelity.

Watch out ladies who've slept with more than 8 men-you're a slut.

Also, all women are heterosexual.

Thursday: Brought to You By the Orginal Gay Slash Fiction Couple

Hot.

2 Hot Transsexuals Finally Give some Answers!

"Has someone ever asked you a question that feels invasive? Has a complete stranger ever made assumptions about your life? Do people tell you that your name and pronouns puts a strain on their lives? Red and Charles answer some of these challenging questions!" - freshlycharles



So. Awesome.

Who's Hotter? The Undead Edition

Being home sick the last few days has given me time to ponder some of life's important questions. Unfortunately, the feverish brain isn't always the best judge of what qualifies as an "important question," and in this case, the brain-scrambling, gray matter liquifying, ideologically blindsiding subject I've been considering is--who's hotter, Spike or Angel?


So, stop for a second with those Bill Compton and Eric Northman debates and remember the ontological struggle you experienced when faced with a decision between Louis and Lestat. Then, remember how the whole Louis/Lestat question was disqualified due to the burned-in-your-memory portrayal of both of these characters by none other than the extremely unsexy Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise, respectively. Ok, no judgement here. It's cool to get hot over what gets you hot. Be proud, nuff said. But, seriously, if you do think either of those hunks of celluloid is the spiciest spice on your Mexican pizza, do you ever really tell anyone?


Ok, I digress. Clearly, my complete lack of the hots for B.P. and T.C., respectively, as well as my valiant call for respect for the original vamps of prime time, demonstrates the unwavering importance of the Spike vs. Angel query. There you have it. Rational. Relevant. Of the upmost importance in a world filled with viral vampire media marketing campaigns.

One's got a chip in his brain, the other's got a soul.

One has a cockney drawl, the other a terrible (and I mean, terrible) Irish accent.

Both have rollicking tempers and washboard abs.

Who will it be, people? I'll let you decide.

Get "Person"alized

'Cause you know ladies, nothing says personhood like having a fella give you a set of panties with his name on them.

Ok, maybe it is a tad sexy to be holding the name of your lover so close to your love bits, but just remember to subvert ideas of ownership people.

A Little Too-Literal interpretation, Anyone?

Wow.



I'm guessing whoever built this is either the most naive person ever, or living happily knowing they pulled one of the weirdest pranks of the 20th century.

Lickety Split smut zine Seeks Project Coordinator and Treasurer!!

Lickety Split smut zine is searching for a volunteer to become our new project coordinator and treasurer. We are looking for an extremely organized and motivated individual to manage the administrative and financial tasks related to the running of the zine. Previous experience in project management/administration is an asset, as are strong interpersonal and leadership skills. This is a non-hierarchical position expected to be performed while continually encouraging and maintaining collective and consensus based decision making.

Tasks and Responsibilities:

• Organizing meetings of the Lickety Split team and taking minutes
  
• Working with each department to set deadlines
  
• Liaising with all departments re. workflow, deadlines, meetings
• Facilitating the creation of annual budget as well as budgets for all departments
• Managing bank account
  
• Organizing and filing invoices and receipts in an orderly fashion to create a clear paper trail
• Processing payment to vendors (printers, etc.)
• Whenever necessary acting as an intermediary contact and administrator re. general inquiries
  
• Keeping zine on track by staying on top of future plans and initiating action in respect to these
  

Though this is an unpaid gig, refreshments, space and time will be available as well as major kudos, high fives and freebies along the way. For those of you who are interested in beefing up your resume, or have talent to share, please send your CV and get in contact with Sarah at sarah@licketysplitzine.com.

The deadline to apply is September 30th, 5pm. Lickety Split is an equal opportunity "employer" and members of traditionally disadvantaged groups are encouraged to apply.

Lickety Split smut zine Seeks Advertising Guru!!

Lickety Split smut zine is searching for a self-motivated, organized and marketing-savvy volunteer to become our new advertising guru!

As a publication and community that prioritizes sex positive expression and thought, and considers compromising our politics a major turn-off, our ad person would work to approach like-minded businesses and organizations to sell ad space while continually upholding the Lickety Split mandate. With the additional duties of conducting ongoing research into potential advertisers as well as the creation and maintenance of our ad contact database, creativity is a must, as is the ability to work autonomously and in collaboration with the Lickety Split team. Previous experience is an asset, and while this is an unpaid gig, there is future potential for commission based on total sales. What’s more, we’re happy to be approached by students who are interested in this position as an internship/Co-op opportunity.

For those of you who are interested in beefing up your resume, or have talent to share, please send a cover letter and your CV to sarah@licketysplitzine.com.

The deadline to apply is September 30th, 5pm. Lickety Split is an equal opportunity "employer" and members of traditionally disadvantaged groups are encouraged to apply.

Lickety Split is a pansexual smut zine dedicated to encouraging sex-positive expression and thought. The zine promotes collaborative art making and encourages diverse contributions to climb into bed with one another, because one sexual expression just does not satisfy. Lickety Split wants to help make the masses cum with smutty photography and art, essays and stories in order to fulfill the whole human being and address the complexity of sex.

Lickety Split smut zine Seeks Fundraiser Fantastico!!

Lickety Split smut zine is searching for self-motivated, organized and outgoing volunteer to help us make our fundraising dreams come true!

We are looking for a creative individual who has a knack for drumming up a diverse array of fun and innovative fundraising strategies and events ⎯ be they silent auctions, rock shows, workshops, sponsorships, you name it. If you’ve got the ideas and the chutzpah to make them a reality, we want to hear about it!

As always, the ability to work autonomously and in collaboration with the Lickety Split team, volunteers, and especially our event planner, is a must — as is a keen sense of what makes people open their wallets and pull out their chequebooks. Now is an especially exciting time to be part of the Lickety Split team and, as the zine grows, we are looking for someone to help us expand our revenue streams to include sponsors, grants and promotion of membership and subscriptions. As fundraiser, your main responsibilities would include:

• Planning and organizing fundraising events alone and with the Lickety Split team
• Approaching and maintaining relationships with current and potential sponsors
  
• The creation and maintenance of Lickety Split's sponsorship database
• Ongoing research into applicable grants and similar revenue streams
• Development of membership and promotion of subscriptions

Though this is currently an unpaid gig, refreshments, space and time will be available as well as major kudos, high fives and freebies along the way. Each issue of Lickety Split relies heavily on the revenue generated by fundraising and your contribution in this capacity is essential to our production!

For those of you who are interested in beefing up your resume, or have talent to share, please send a cover letter and your CV to Sarah at sarah@licketysplitzine.com. What’s more, we’re happy to be approached by students who are interested in this position as an internship/Co-op opportunity.

The deadline to apply is September 30th, 5pm. Lickety Split is an equal opportunity "employer" and members of traditionally disadvantaged groups are encouraged to apply.

Lickety Split is a pansexual smut zine dedicated to encouraging sex-positive expression and thought. The zine promotes collaborative art making and encourages diverse contributions to climb into bed with one another, because one sexual expression just does not satisfy. Lickety Split wants to help make the masses cum with smutty photography and art, essays and stories in order to fulfill the whole human being and address the complexity of sex.