Do you enjoy sex? Do you want to be on the radio?

Well, now's yer chance!

CKUT 90.3FMs sex radio show Audio Smut invites you to send us your sex-related New Years Resolutions and we'll read them on air during our upcoming show, January 2nd from 6-7pm!

How do you do this? Just send us an e-mail listing your resolutions or get fancy and send us an mp3! Use that mic on your computer, record your voice (or however you wanna do it) get your stuff into us by Monday December 31st! Please send to: a AT licketysplitzine DOT com

We'll also be discussing top news items and themes related to sex from 2007 as well as listening to a few tunes. You know, laid back and easy! Yeah. Just how I wanna roll in 2008. ;)

Thanks!

Audio Smut is a radio show based in Montreal that looks at sex from all angles: educational, political, cultural and kinky. Tune in the first wednesday of every month from 6-7pm on CKUT 90,3 FM. Audio Smut is one of four shows that air during the Hersay hour. To listen on-line and download past shows visit ckut.ca.

Weekly Video -- Wanda Sykes Detachable Pussy

Sorry for the delay -- I was on the road. I'm not usually a huge stand-up fan, but we're ending 2007 with this cuz it made me giggle.



Happy New Year!

Weekly Video -- Konichiwa Bitches!

This vid by Robyn is all-round awesome, but check 1:30 for the best shout out ever to the small-chested ladies in the house.




That's how I organize 'em too!


ps thanks again to Mike

Slow Dance Night is tomorrow!

Le Cagibi at 5490 St-Laurent Blvd (corner St. Viateur)
Friday, December 21st, 2007
9pm to 1am, $5 includes Dancecard/Corsage!
Lickety Split #5 will also be on sale as well as Lickety Split #4.
Fresh copies of LS #4 & #5 are also gonna be dropped off at Cheap Thrills Friday around noon!

Xmass tonight + Slow Dance Night this Friday!

We're going to be tabling at the Indyish Monthly Mess tonight starting at 9:00 at the downtown Ye Olde Orchard (1189 de la Montagne). Come on out, check out the crafts and have a beer with us!
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=5809999958

***
SLOW DANCE NIGHT!
We have a lending library of resident dancers for all you wall flowers! This is a queer, kid, and senior friendly event. Dress fancy and get your dancecard filled.

Le Cagibi at 5490 St-Laurent Blvd (corner St. Viateur)
Friday, December 21st, 2007
9pm to 1am, $5 includes Dancecard/Corsage!

Tomorrow night, we will be crafting dance cards and corsages to give out at the door!
A note on dance cards:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dance_card

A note on corsages:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corsage

A note on our dance cards and corsages: they will include the play list, etiquette as well as condoms (which can simply be made into dental dams):
http://www.soc.ucsb.edu/sexinfo/?article=U1N7

Cheers!

Weekly Video -- Snoop Seduces...

Welcome to the first installation of the weekly panty-creamer!



It seems only right to start off this series with the work of a smut-peddler. You'll recall that in 2001 Snoop produced the first hardcore porn hip hop video, Snoop Dogg's Doggystyle.

10 Reasons to have sex over the holidays!

Are you looking forward to your holiday break? I am! But what to do with all those unoccupied hours, long stretches of time without deadlines, phone calls and priority items? Have sex, of course! Our favorite Canadian sex shop Come As You Are have recently out together a list of ten reasons to have sex over the holidays...as if you needed a reason! Check 'em out here.

The magickal Stripping Magician at Just for Laughs!

Check out this video of a stripping magician at Just For Laughs, the comedy festival:
http://www.graemevilleret.com/index.php?2006/08/18/24-une-magicienne-nue-au-festival-juste-pour-rire-de-montreal
I saw her with my own eyes at the La Clique burlesque show this year. Totally awesome and fun live! Thanks to Aimee for passing this along!

Making Space for Working Women!

DECEMBER 17th: RED UMBRELLA MARCH LED BY STELLA AND ALLIES
Join Stella and our friends and allies for a Red Umbrella March, an activity for the 5th International day to End Violence Against Sex Workers. We will depart at 5pm from Frontenac Metro, Montréal. Together we will take the time to honour our sisters and brothers who have experienced violence at work and those we have loved and lost... And to say: Enough is Enough!!!
For more info and literature, please visit the Stella website.
Stella’s goals are:
• to provide support and information to sex-workers so that they may live in safety and with dignity;
• to sensitize and educate the public about sex work and the realities faced by sex workers;
• to fight discrimination against sex workers;
• to promote the decriminalisation of sex work.
Stella favours empowerment and solidarity by and amongst sex workers, since we are committed to the idea that each of us has a place in society, and human rights worth defending.

Faggity Ass Fridays: Good, queer fun in the Mile End area.

So if the village ain't quite your vibe or you don't want to sweat the cab fare back to St. Viateur, check out Faggity Ass Fridays every Friday at the Main Hall (5390 St-Laurent). Starting at 11pm, this night is a DJ dance party and art night for queer folk and their friends! There is usually a small cover charge or pay-what-you-can sitch' at the door and all that moola goes to the Head & Hands Sense Project, a totally righteous peer-based sex education program to supplement the lack of sex-ed in Quebec high schools.

About this Friday, December 7th:
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snooooow!

Alright kidz, Faggity-Ass Fridays wants to celebrate hot chocolate snow days in style! So put on your velcro booties and sexy scarves and cum dance with your favorite snow bunnies: DJ Dirtyboots, Xavier and Tommy Horror.

We've got DeAnne Smith telling tall tales and a short film called Anima & Animus as as warm up.

Guest DJ: Tommy Horror!
Resident DJs: Dirty Boots and Xavier T.

Good times!

See you there! xo

Dec. 19th: Gifts, art and more at the X-MESS!

Hello darlings,
I hope that y'all are cozy and indoors with someone you're sweet on or something piping hot (a cafe au lait perhaps, or a copy of Lickety Split #5?). In any case, if you missed the Lickety Split tabling action this past weekend at the Flea Affair, come check out the latest issue at Indyish's December edition of the Monthly Mess: X-MESS! Yup, that's right: we'll be tabling next to other awesome publications and artists at the Art Mart while listening to the sweet sounds of bands like Spiral Beach, Sister Suvi and Wax Mannequin.

An extra special feature of the evening will be a holiday box waiting for your donations of cash, gifts for little kids and non-perishable food items for the youth who access services at local youth organization Head & Hands.
If you can't make this event, give a little to Head & Hands by donating on-line here or support Lickety Split and Indyish.com by purchasing stuff here.
Good chee and all that! Enjoy the wintery wonderland and be good and dirty in yer woolens!

Dink in a Box: Shannon Gerard!

From the inimitable Shannon Gerard, past Lickety Split contributor and all-around fascinating person:

I know you know at least one person who would love a Boob for Christmas!

Nothing tells that special mohel in your life how much you appreciate them more than a Dink for Hanukkah!

And to quote the indefatigable Justin Timberlake: "Kwanzza. Dink in a box."

There are three-- yes THREE-- chances in the next two weeks for you to make these holiday dreams come true.

On Saturday December 1st (this weekend!), I'll be taking part in CITY OF CRAFT-- a new event being held this year in the Theatre Centre at 1087 Queen Street West. That's the basement of the Great Hall at Queen and Dovercourt. The event runs from 11AM til 8PM. There are over 60 vendors selling handmade, locally produced crafty goodness. There are workshops and demos happening all day (I'm teaching folks how to crochet their very own dinky finger puppets between 1 and 2PM) and admission is totally free!

More details at http://www.cityofcraft.com

On Sunday December 2nd (the very next day), I'll be at the OCAD BOOK ARTS FAIR. 100 McCaul Street on the second floor. 11AM til 5PM. More handmade heaven, but this time with an emphasis on books and prints. There are also some amazing deals on letterpress paraphernalia, papermaking supplies, and book related ephemera.

More details on facebook, here: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=5862682153

The next weekend, Saturday December 8th and Sunday December 9th-- there are two parties happening at ART METROPOLE as part of their annual GIFTS BY ARTISTS show and sale. On both Saturday and Sunday between 2PM and 5PM, you can stop by Art Met-- 788 King Street West-- for a drink and dink, a boozy booby, and first dibs on some pretty amazing multiples and artists books they'll have for sale. The sale runs til January 5th.

More details and gorgeous photographs here: http://artmetropole.com/popups/events_exhibits.cfm?str_filename=exhibits/exhibits_07/gba/gba.htm

Consider supporting local artists and buying handmade this year. If you can't make it out to these events, or if you are interested in taking a peek at some of the stuff I've been making lately, check out my ETSY SHOP:

http://www.shannongerard.etsy.com

Etsy is the most amazing international online marketplace for all things handmade.

Seasonal Joy and Love from me to you!
Shannon.

Check us out at the Flea Affair this Saturday!

If you missed us at Expozine and still have some cash burning a hole in your pocket, come say hi to the gentle mannered folks behind the Lickety Split table at the Flea Affair! This is an awesome event organized by cool ladies (one of whom is Jill our events organizer, of Quel Damage-Episode Design fame)and is going down in the Mile End. Be there or be square!

Expozine was a hoot! (check out these photos)

Aw man, I looove Expozine! "Montreal's Annual Small Press, Comic and Zine Fair" is something of a milestone for a lot of indie publshers and artists in this city. It functions as a place to celebrate and sell some amazing and beautiful/weird/wacky art as well as a deadline for many others who are looking for one. I think that many folks in this milieu understand challenges that can come up in terms of ones motivation, and personally, Expozine always reaffirms how awesome this city is in terms of creative output.
But anywhoo. Here are some photos by Sherwin Tjia, a longtime Lickety Split collaborator (for example, he's our official cover artist). I'm throwing in a couple of us at the end from the Faggity Ass Queer Stripper-ganza too!
The Lickety Split table, directly next to Sherwin's table, separated only by our Slow Dance Night Poster!
Amber, Kathleen and Sherwin!
The throngs of art adoring fans! Please buy our smut!
K$ representing behind the table on Sunday!
Gamble's dog Lucy is a sexy bitch.
Our loverly Sherwin (at the strip show)...
Et moi! Pushing zines as always...co-tablers for LIFE!(also, at the queer strip show)
Thanks to all who came out and bought Lickety Split stuff or just came by to say hi!!!!!!

Hearts,
Amber

Do you hear what I hear? : The Sound Sex Project

Recently Mark Harris, a local musician in the band On Bodies and a Concordia University Media Studies MA candidate, sent me an e-mail giving me a heads up about a new project he's been putting together entitled the Sound Sex Project. Here's what he has to say about it:

Music becomes imbued with meaning through the myriad of ways that we use sound and song in our daily lives.

The Sound Sex Project seeks to explore how sound articulates desire, and how people use music to orchestrate their sexual encounters.

I began thinking about the links between sound, music, sex and arousal in an attempt to write about audio in pornography. My critique of the porn soundtracks was that sound quality seemed to be of less concern than image, that the noises of bodies and voices were often muted, and that pornographic scores were often cheesy, bland and repetitive.

Yet, in reading theorist Tia DeNora, whose work has informed this project, I was faced with my own arrogance. Who was I to deem what kind of music might or might not instigate sexual activity? Everyone uses music and sound in a different way.

This is where the Sound Sex Project needs your help. I would love any varying degree of participation, but my basic request is:

-Please send me the name of an audio track and artist which you have played during a sexual encounter. If you have an mp3 file of the sound/song, e-mail that as well. Please send your submission to:

soundsexproject@gmail.com

I will post all submissions chronologically on my blog, so please indicate if you would like your name to be used, if you would like to use a pseudonym, or if you would rather remain anonymous.

My aim is to compile a Sound Sex Project mix CD for everyone who participates. After the first compilation has been completed, feel free to submit to the project again.

I would love to post additional information about your song choice. If you are willing to share more than just the sound selection, other information you might include could be:

-your biographical info
-how your musical choice affected your sexual encounter
-what type of technology you used to play your soundtrack
-why you chose that particular work
-any other thoughts or reflections

Thank you for reading, and I look forward to hearing from you. Once again, please send all entries to:

soundsexproject@gmail.com

We're at Expozine this Saturday and Sunday!

Expozine will take place on Saturday, November 24 and Sunday, November 25, 2007, from 12 p.m. to 6 p.m. at 5035 St-Dominique (Église Saint-Enfant Jésus, between St-Joseph and Laurier, near Laurier Métro). Free admission.

This incredible event brings together over 250 creators of all kinds of printed matter – from books to zines to visual art and comics – in both English and French. In the past six years, Expozine has become one of North America's largest small press fairs, attracting thousands of visitors as well as exhibitors from as far afield as Chicago, Halifax, New York, Toronto, Ottawa, and Quebec City!

Expozine brings together a multitude of publications and printed works that are often difficult to find in the first place, much less altogether in the same room! The result is a rare opportunity to peruse the work of hundreds of young and emerging authors, publishers and artists, and to see what the winners of last year’s Expozine Alternative Press Awards are up to. Not to be missed!

Check out our Etsy.com store!

!!!
licketysplitsmutzine.etsy.com
!!!

Vagina Dentata Movie!

Okay, so the trailer for this flick looks incredibly misogynistic; I still intend to cackle my way through it. The gyno scene alone is worth the price of admission. Who's with me?

Image 1 from http://biancabean.wordpress.com/2007/05/15/angry-beaver/
Image 2 from Google images

Tampon Turkey

The things crafty people come up with. What kind of gravy would you serve with that?

For the recipe, go to http://www.tamponcrafts.com/turkey.html

Zinester to check out: Spencer Butt!

After reading a review in Broken Pencil of Spencer Butt's zine/chapbook "I wish raptors still existed so I could get disemboweled and finally spill my guts to someone", I decided to to get a copy. He happily suggested a trade and included a copy of the more recent "My name is Scientist". I love them both!!! Here is an excerpt from the poem "I wish I was a poet" from ""Sometimes I wish raptors...":

I want to spread your legs apart with a sense of wonder, as
if I'm opening the closet to Narnia
and I wanna be lion, bewitched in the many folds and
crevices of your dirty, little wardrobe.

To get in contact with Butt check out www.myspace.com/thirtysecondblurbs