Thursday, November 27, 2008
It's also a deadly accurate recreation of the dirty deeds that went down in the Beyond Human launch photo booth.
For realz. It was wild in there.
Tori Amos - "Icicle"
"And when my hand touches myself,Check out the list here.
I can finally rest my head.
And when they take from his body,
I think I'll take from mine instead,
Getting off, getting off while they're all downstairs."
Come say hi to the Lickety voolunteers and pick up a copy of the latest and greatest!
EXPOZINE 2008, MONTREAL’S SEVENTH ANNUAL SMALL PRESS, COMIC AND ZINE FAIR!
Expozine, Montreal’s annual small press, comic and zine fair, will take place on Saturday, November 29 and Sunday, November 30, 2008, from 12 p.m. to 6 p.m. at 5035 St-Dominique (Église Saint-Enfant Jésus, between St-Joseph and Laurier, near Laurier Métro). Free admission.
Shannon Gerard: past Lickety Split contributor and an amazing book and comic artist! This is sooo cool, wish I was in town to check this workshop out. Go and tell us all about it after, OK? Shannon will also be at Expozine this weekend.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Head and Hands is hosting one more free anonymous HIV testing nights as part of their World AIDS Day campaign. These clinics will be taking place Monday, Dec. 1st from 1-5pm. Like their medical clinics, the testing nights are confidential, do not require medicare, and for youth 12-25.
5833 Sherbrooke West, Montréal
Metro Vendôme, Bus 105
Girls Action Foundation-Fondation filles d’action is a national charitable organization that inspires and supports the empowerment, leadership and healthy development of girls and young women across
- University degree or college diploma in communications, public relations or a related discipline.
- 3-5 years experience in communications, public relations, government relations, or related field
- Fluency in French and English (written and oral)
- Knowledge of Canadian and
- Superior writing, editing and oral communication skills in English
- Demonstrated success in the development and implementation of proactive communication initiatives including media relations; event planning and coordination; the creation of marketing tools and online communications.
- Experience initiating and managing on-line communications including web content management, promotion and e-communications/campaigning strategies
- Ability to manage concurrent projects with competing deadlines
- Strong planning and organizational skills with excellent attention to detail
- Ability to work independently, as part of a team
- Knowledge of Web site software is an asset
- Experience in a feminist organization is an asset.
How to apply
Please send resume, cover letter, two relevant samples of your writing, salary expectations and at least two references by
(Electronic submissions are encouraged)
Applications can also be faxed to: 514-948-5926
Or mailed to:
Girls Action Foundation – Fondation filles d’action
24 Mont Royal Ouest, Suite 601
Montreal, Quebec H2T 2S2
We thank everyone for applying but only those selected for an interview will be contacted.
FEMINIST RESPONSES TO THE
RÉPONSES FÉMINISTES À LA COMMISSION BOUCHARD-TAYLOR
The symposium brings together scholars and representatives of immigrant and women’s groups in
Le symposium se propose non seulement de réexaminer les travaux et le rapport de la commission, mais aussi de susciter une discussion critique quant à la place à réserver aux prises de position féministes dans le débat sur les accommodements raisonnables.
Nancy Burrows, Fédération des femmes du Québec
Emilie Connolly and Robyn Maynard, Accommodate This! (awesome!!!)
Samaa Elibyari, Canadian Council of Muslim Women
Louise Langevin, Université Laval
Daniel Weinstock, Université de Montréal
Date: Friday, November 28th, 2008, 9 am to 5 pm, Leacock, Room 232
Please register: (514) 398-3911 or email@example.com
Monday, November 24, 2008
Smut: The final frontier. A portal to virtual realities, a playground for fantastic characters, a narrative told in impossible destinies. At the border of human and other, which basic sexual elements turn you into a ticking A-bomb? This issue, Lickety Split asks you to slip out of that mortal husk and into something more… Existential? Divine? Synthetic? Beastly? Vegetal?? We’ll be waiting in the other room, mixing ourselves a cocktail and adjusting our tailfeathers and blowholes (hee).
The Beyond Human Issue includes work by Matt Forsythe, Sherwin Tjia, Farah Kahn, Nick Cabelli, Astria Suparak, Steven Lawrence, Omar Rahman, Darell Smith, Mark Harris, Kim Bastien & Laura Kingsley, Eric Hanson, Jonathan Stewart, Noam , Robby Reis, Max D., and more!
More colour pages than ever! Shimmery gold and pink covers! Richly saturated black and white images! Great writing! Naked people! FSC-approved printing process! Self-actualized smut!
>>>>VOTED #3 Maga(zine) in the Montreal Mirror Best Of Montreal 2008!<<<<<
“Since appearing in 2004, Lickety Split has been dedicated to tenting your pants, wetting your undies and pressing a nerve.” - Sacha Jackson, The Montreal Mirror
“It seems that every marginalized group wants its own version of pornography — punks, gays, lesbians, straight indie-rock chicks. But for those who want all of the above, there’s Lickety Split.” - Amber Drea, Venus Zine
Sunday, November 23, 2008
...But for now you'll have to check em out on Facebook right here. Thanks to the lovely Abby for all her picture taking goodness! Pictured here are Abby and yours truly, Amber! More photos on the blog, Flickr, etc real soon. Especially Kathleen's costume. That was fucking out of this world!
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Expozine, Montreal’s annual small press, comic and zine fair, will have its largest edition by far take place on Saturday, November 29 and Sunday, November 30, 2008, from 12 p.m. to 6 p.m. at 5035 St-Dominique (Église Saint-Enfant Jésus, between St-Joseph and Laurier, near Laurier Métro). Free admission.
This incredible event brings together more than 250 different creators of all kinds of printed matter – from books to zines to visual art and comics – in both English and French. In the past seven years, Expozine has grown to become Canada's largest small press fair, attracting thousands of visitors as well as exhibitors from as far afield as France, Belgium, British Colombia, Philadelphia, New York, Halifax, Toronto, Vermont, Ottawa, and Quebec City!
At Expozine, you can discover a multitude of publications that can be hard to find in the first place, much less altogether in the same room! It’s a rare opportunity to peruse the work of hundreds of young and emerging authors, publishers and artists, and to see what the winners of last year’s Expozine Alternative Press Awards are up to. Not to be missed!
For more information, please visit www.expozine.ca or email firstname.lastname@example.org .
Expozine is made possible in part through the support of the Canada Council for the Arts.
Yesss! Last night was an amazing success! Thanks for coming out and supporting our wee smut zine on a cold November evening. We'll be sending out e-mails regarding the Dirty Photo Booth this week. Also, photos from the evening will be posted on the Lickety blog as soon as we can recover from last night. If anyone has an photos from the night, please send them to email@example.com!
IT AIN'T OVER, Y'ALL. Next weekend we'll be at Expozine in Montreal (grab the new issue if you couldn't make it to the party!) and also we'll be co-producing a Slowdance Night in Toronto. See you there!
Facebook event for the Slowdance Night Winter Formal (Toronto):
Facebook even page for Expozine (Montreal):
All the best,
Lickety Split smut zine xo
Friday, November 21, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
I expect no less from you this time tomorrow evening than the carnal excesses displayed below. To the cat-house we will go!
So delightfully unwholesome.
Our DJ for the evening is one Nick Cabelli, who you may recognize from this blog or his own or from a certain local record shop or from the zine itself, or, or ,or...
Man of the "oddcasts". Check out the archive of "oddcasts" here.
Be sure to try on one of the boob robots at the launch party! Thanks Nick!
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
About the Dead Doll Dancers:
"The Dead Doll Dancers has been told by LicketySplit -the artful smutzine as being Montreal's raunchiest troupe of dancing girls.The term 'boundary pushing burlesque' has been thrust upon us ..... However the Mirror perhaps described us best as 'doing crack whore booty shaking'. yup...we are zombshells who simply like to shake it. We have performed at corporate events and other soirees requiring ambient zombie girl dancing."
Check out their MySpace page here.
Keep a look out for these ladies as they cavort around town! They'll be helping party goers into their masks as well as to become Dead Dollz for the evening. Yessss!
by Mark Harris
A friend once told me that she liked a man with a bit of dirt under his fingernails. This was as much about her distaste for the commodity of metrosexual as it was about her love for a gritty version/vision of masculinity. I think this is an inventive way of explaining one’s desire. I, too, like men with some dirt beneath their fingernails.
Of course, I also know that this particular strain of masculinity, like any other gender, is not predicated on biological sex. Nothing makes this more evident to me than Sarah Connor.
Yes, I mean the one and only Sarah Connor, the fictional character played by Linda Hamilton in the first two Terminator movies. But let us focus on Sarah Connor in Terminator 2: Judgment Day.
Sarah Connor is incredibly hot. We first see the renegade inmate doing chin-ups on makeshift gym equipment in a high-security psych ward. Muscles flexing, sweat dripping, skin greasy with hospital grime and hair unkempt, Connor turns to the camera and her captor with eyes piercing and cunning.
Connor is fucking tough. I get a strange sense of satisfaction when she knocks out the vile prison guard who, in a prior scene, had licked her face. Connor comes out of nowhere, treading silent, wielding a broomstick, enacting revenge in a brutal flash of wood, blood, and bone.
Connor is a visionary and a vigilante. After dreaming the end of the world while carving premonitions into a picnic bench with a hunting knife, she cuts across the desert in a speeding vehicle to assassinate Miles Dyson. Dyson is the inventor of Skynet, the computer that will eventually instigate a nuclear holocaust, Judgment Day. Carrying a high-powered rifle, Connor invokes a Valerie Solanas for the posthuman world; she must take aim at both man and machine. Moreover, while Solanas called for armies of women, Connor is a lone warrior. Not even the cyborg, the Terminator Cyberdyne Systems Model 101, can halt the impending catastrophe. Only Connor is fierce enough for that.
Connor repudiates the biblical sex roles foisted upon her body. Her womb is not just some vessel for John Connor, the Christ figure who will supposedly avert the end of the world. Instead, it is Sarah Connor who breaks free of the panoptic prison system, crawls through the muck and mire, survives the sharp metallic wrath of the T-1000, ruptures the Old Testament adages of Judgment Day, and changes the course of the future.
Connor is the anti-technology technology. The Terminators are beyond human; one is a meeting of machine and organic tissue, a true cyborg in the sense of the word, while the other is purely synthetic, liquid metal so advanced it emulates what it sees. Yet Connor destroys them both. Furthermore, she targets the very root of the problem. In an eruption of explosives, broken glass, and fire, Connor wipes out the faceless corporation that manufactures the deathmachines, and extinguishes its deathdrive forever. While it seems as though the T-1000 is always just a step behind, running to its frenetic theme song with arm-claws outstretched, it is in fact Connor who is always two steps ahead of machine, of corporation, and of man.
There is dirt beneath Sarah Connor’s fingernails.
Read more by Mark Harris in issue 7 of Lickety Split!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Festooned Hand Mirror (Guitar, Vocals)
Tin Smoke Box (Keyboards, Guitar, Vocals)
Red Oak Frame (Drums)
Some hype-y and totally worthy press quotes:
"This local trio of self-professed "sloppy" rockers carve out a kind of pop art brut, a beautiful mess of raw (but never ridiculous) emotion and rough (but never unintelligible) textures, with bold, tender melodies standing tall from end to end." - Lorraine Carpenter, Montreal Mirror
"Inspired by the best of 90s shoegazer and 80s angular post-punk, Parlovr have crafted a memorable debut of indie rock tunes that cherry-picks the best elements from multiple rock genres and synthesizes them into a package that sports clear pop sensibilities." - Jordan Bimm, NOW Magazine (Toronto)
Listen to 'em here.
Photo of PARLOVR at the Lickety Split #5 launch party:
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Yessss!! So this is the SECOND in a series of band and launch collaborator introductions here on the blog. All three bands that are playing at the launch are interviewed in the upcoming issue by one Mr. Nick Cabelli, Lickety Lad- so watch out for that too! Please get to know these bands so that you may responsibly take part in some consensual party-ness on Nov. 21st.
Erin Ross - guitar, vocals
Amber Goodwyn - guitar, vocals
Famous Eric - drums
“There are forests and darkness. In these places lie a bewilderment of pathless-ness and blindness, and soft ground cover that cushions footsteps. Within this, we are compelled to make our small sound, to salute nocturnal emissions and to dispel the un-navigable and create sonic opportunities, or, A Way Out.” - NW
Listen to Nightwood here.
Watch their music videos here.
PS: This is Amber (the publisher's) band. Also, Kathleen KR and Sarah B. star in The Bikeriders music video. Ch-ch-check them out.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Before I recount to you the most uncommon and unarguably queer events that transpired some days ago, allow me to first impress upon you my utter sincerity. Some seven-and-twenty years into my life, I am not now nor have I ever been inclined to flights of fancy or superstitious credulity. As such, it is with the humblest transparency that I transcribe the account of my carnal struggle with none other than a creature from beyond the realms of the righteous and the living.
Read the full story!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
They're in those white boxes. Our furry stockroom creatures will now ferret them out of their cardboard confines and purr smutty wishes all over them before we give 'em out at the zine launch on the 21st.
See you therrrrrre. (purr, purr. how sweetly Beyond Human)
Here's an excerpt from the interview :
"There’s the basics … Get your materials in order. Shelving is good. If you’re living in a nest of filth, you can’t find the shit you want to find, right? So if you like a lot of different stuff, it’s good to have categories. You can be like, “Okay. There’s the nun section, the latex, the hermaphrodites. There’s the spanking and then the lesbian.” Keep it organized."
Read the rest here.
Ahhh, after a long day and a very grounding evening, Jordan has consulted with Aïda and yielded the following responses...
> What is up with the title of your show, GIRL GANG THANK-YOU CARD?
distinct ideas and narratives which I found, when juxtaposed, captured
some of the meanings and meta-meanings of my current work. In
investigating British Columbia as a metaphoric post-colonial
dis/utopia, the narrative of a 1997 homicide immediately came to mind.
BC as containing and suppressing its own beauties and systems of
violence (the recent sex-worker serial killer story being another) has
been an on-going source of fascination to me, even though I stand as
an East-Coast non-participatory viewer and receiver of mediatized
propaganda, myth, and anecdotes which feed our collective impression
of what ideas BC can be used to explore: a post-colonial sub-state, an
intriguing one amongst many which Aïda might consider more subtle
and/or familiar. The Thank-You Card is a reference to certain
anxieties around gratitude, entitlement, gifts, indebtedness, and
teleological thought. Also, the idea of members of a self-identified
"Girl-Gang" actually sending Thank-You cards to their "donors,"
"funders," or "victims" was so grotesquely funny I just couldn't
resist running with it! If expanded into a touring show, the title
may change to something like "Aïda auf Nootka, or Journey to the
> What elements of your show make the posting require an 18+ warning?
extreme reproductive anxiety and bodily pain. I did not want to be
responsible for assisting very young people is processing or reacting
to it, and felt more comfortable with consenting adults' possible
misinterpretations than with those of "underage youth". There will
also be some overtly sexual pantomine. In another more supportive
context (and one without illicit alcohol sales at the venue), showing
this to minors would not necessarily present a problem for me.
> How does this work figure into the greater context of your oeuvre?
two parts. Classical performance (i.e. Western, published, text-based
theatre), and drag/performance art. This piece will function as my
attempt to reconcile (and explode/confound/shake off) these two
distinct streams of my own performative history. I will allow
dialogue, linear narrative (of sorts), and illusionism-- as in
classical theatre-- but will attempt to shed, at the same time, the
preposterous seriousness and hermetic anti-semiotics of contemporary
"Performance Art" at the same time. It will be a synthesis that will
not shy away from self-deprecation, humour, glory, and fear.
> Thanks for your time!
KUNST MACHT FREI
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Yessss!! So the first in a series of band introductions here on the blog. All three bands that are playing at the launch are interviewed in the upcoming issue by one Mr. Nick Cabelli, Lickety Lad- so watch out for that too! Please get to know these bands so that you may responsibly take part in some consensual party-ness on Nov. 21st.
"Coulees were originally formed in early spring, 2006, by Emily and Mitz in Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada. After several shows, they moved to Montreal, Quebec. Mitz met Conor at a show. Even though they didn't understand each others' accents, after a few fake smiles and noddings of misunderstanding, Conor and Mitz became friends and Conor was recruited as a Coulees' drummer."This lovely trio rocks hard and lovely and we're glad to have them take part in our lovely launch.
Check out their myspace page!
Watch them rawk out at the Fixture Records showcase at Pop Montreal this past October!
Monday, November 10, 2008
This is an amazing and sex-positive youth org located in Montreal. Check out their latest job opportunity below!
A deux mains / Head & Hands, and NDG-based community organization, is looking for a Health Educator with a strong background in health promotion and youth work. Position involves coordinating staff, health counseling and information-sharing with youth, contributing to committee work and fundraising. Understanding of harm reduction and commitment to empowering, non judgmental, holistic approach is necessary, though training will also be provided in these areas. Bilingualism required. Nursing experience is an asset but all candidates with a combination of the skills above are welcome to apply. Position is 30-34 hrs/week, $15/hour (with benefits according to our salary policy). Must be available Tues/Thurs evenings and Tuesday afternoons. Position is permanent pending initial evaluation. Please forward your CV and cover letter to firstname.lastname@example.org by Wednesday, Nov. 19th at 5pm (Health Educator hiring committee). Only candidates selected for an interview will be contacted. Members of traditionally disadvantaged groups are encouraged to apply.
A deux mains/ Head & Hands, un organisme communautaire situé à N-D-G est à la recherche d’une Éducatrice en santé ayant l’expérience de travail de proximité avec les jeunes, dans le domaine de la promotion de santé. Tâches : coordonner les cliniques et le personnel, services directs aux clients en matière de santé et du partage d’information; animation d’ateliers, travail collaborateur et en comité et à l’extérieure de l’organisme. Les compétences recherchées sont le bilinguisme, l’expérience avec ou l’intérêt à travailler avec les jeunes de 12 à 25 ans, forte connaissance du domaine de la santé des jeunes et l’approche de la réduction de méfaits. Le poste est de 30 à 34 heures/semaine, $15/heure (plus avantages sociaux selon notre politique salarial). Le poste est permanent suite à une évaluation initiale. La candidate doit être disponible le mardi après midi ainsi que soit le mardi ou le jeudi soir. Une éducation d’infirmière est un atout mais toute candidate ayant une variété des compétences recherchées sont encouragées à postuler. Le salaire est à déterminer selon le comité de sélection et la discrétion du Conseil d’Administration. Envoyez votre CV avec lettre de motivation à email@example.com avant 17h mercredi le 19 novembre, 2008 (attention : comité educatrice en santé). Seulement les candidates qui sont choisies pour une entrevue seront contactées.
Nous encourageons les candidatures de membres de groupes traditionnellement désavantagés.
Sunday, November 09, 2008
Worn Fashion Journal & Slowdance Night team-up
to bring you The Most Important Night of Your Life!
Featuring the Release of
Worn Fashion Journal issue 7!
Featuring All Slow Songs, All Night Long!
Featuring an Intimate
And there’s more to this Very Special Evening!
A Lending Library of Resident Dancers!
A Photobooth for the Fashion-Passionate!
Fancy dress, while not
required, is greatly desired.
$10 Formal Ticket
comes with the very
Latest Issue of Worn
Fashion Journal as well
as your Dancecard!
Saturday, November 29, 2008 at 9:00pm
Dovercourt House, 805 Dovercourt Road
(1 block n. of Bloor, 3 sts. west of Ossington)
This is a queer & senior friendly event.
This is a co-production of Lickety Split smut zine,
Perpetual Emotion Machine Productions,
and Worn Fashion Journal.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Friday, November 07, 2008
...the Concordia Co-op Bookstore has copies of So Many Ways to Sleep Badly left for you to pity-buy and console yourself with.
Yay! We're gonna start posting the monthly CKUT sex radio show Audio Smut here on this blog, so enjoy!!
The last episode's topic was SHAME! They also have an on-going soap opera/serial you need to tune into.
Audio Smut is a radio show about all things relating to sex from cultural, political, and educational standpoints. We are a feminist collective of sex positive activists who are committed to finding creative ways of challenging notions of decency. We’re here to shake things up, moan in your ears, and provoke your inner pervert. Listen in the first Wednesday of every month at six o clock and stay sexy.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Kate Beckinsale on home life:
"I don't like to walk around wearing no make-up with my hair rolled on top of my head on my days off. I think my husband would be a bit bummed out if I did. It's nice to feel like you're wooing the other person a bit, as once it degenerates into wearing yesterday's sweatpants and farting on the sofa, you lose a bit of the spice. You've got to keep up the seduction phase - it's fun."
I find myself reacting to this in three ways:
- OK, each to their own. No judgement passing here!
- Interesting! Prioritizing being kinky is kind neat!
- Fuck off! Fuck this perpetual "seduction phase"! Fuck having to be clean, cute and fuckable at all times!
Pictured above: Kate NOT FARTING on a couch.
Useful link: Feminism
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
"We created Genderanalyzer out of curiosity and fun. It uses Artificial Intelligence to determine if a homepage is written by a man or woman. Behind the scene, a text classifier hosted over at uClassify.com has been trained on 2000 blogs written by men and women. In our lab it seems to works pretty well, we want to see how it performs on the web! We hope you like it!"
Blocked in London, England! Maybe just an internet cafe issue, but Marty screen-shot it anyway. Apparently our friends in Turkey cannot access us on the web either. A stumbling block in the way of world domination but also a vote for the paper zine!
From Vince, some good questions:
"Did this happen from her hotel room or was it from a residential ISP connection? Because if it's a hotel then regardless of personal belief, if they want to institute a policy of no access to pornography sites then they have every right to. A lot of porn sites are just attack points for trojan/virus/malware infestation so... that might be the reasoning. If it's from a residential line, then that's just icing on the cake of the Orwellian nightmare that is already invading England..."
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Marty has usurped Oliver. The way to combat eye-rot from computer glare is to change locations to fake your body into thinking that your hours are varied, interesting and normal. Note: wall-mounted kalimbas, Verdun skies, handmade dolls by LK. We are now working in separate locations communicating via Gmail, Google Documents and Skype/iChat.
Oliver sleeps while work is being done in the other room. He's our Beyond Human mascot for issue #7 and fuzzy inspiration for a laid back approach to zine-making!
Saturday, November 01, 2008
This here is *safesolvent. He is laying our suh-weet baby down while K$ and I work on some content related bidniss in the background. Pizza to arrive soon! The printers need their junk for Monday.